Peak Bio Boost

Coming Soon - I look at this product from both a scientific and anecdotal point of view, with the aim of making you buy some. Through an amalgamation of my own experiences, Yahoo! searches, and comparison/contrast hypotheses with actual results, I prove that this gimmicky ass shit works. With the power of basic math, I will also prove that this supplemental prebiotic is far more economical than other poop problem solutions - including both supplements and specific food combinations!

Seriously, when you break it down, you can price out the cost per poop. If you want good poops, you’re going to pay upwards of $7-8 per quality poop. That’s as expensive as smoking cigarettes, Jesus Christ! With Peak BioBoost, you can easily halve your cost per quality poop.

What do I mean by “quality” poop? If you’re subscribed to the Rockydennis Presents “Taking a Dump” YouTube Exclusive Series Patreon, then you know what we’re talking about. If not, enjoy these images. First, you will smile, then you will see a simple, yet accurate, chart of poop types.

You don’t get higher than a 10.

Make it stand out

Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

I don’t have permission to use this chart. I doubt the site I stole it from does, either.

9/3/2021 7:09 AM
Stopping here for now. Will finish later.

9/3/2021 9:59 PM
Back.

My primary idea upon return was to focus on the ingredients, find them in stuff I normally waste money on, then actually look them up on the internet from different sources that aren’t copy/pasted…. BUT THEN I SAW FUNNY PICTURES

I’m not really that sidetracked, I just felt the need to promptly paste this image before I forgot. It’s from the actual Peak Bio Boost advertisement page.

But then I saw this….

So obviously oat fiber is kind of a no-brainer. I assume this is dried oat fiber (ground up oatmeal, let’s be honest), which is probably why the ad suggests to put Peak Bio Boost in your coffee. You may not know this, but eating raw oats makes them difficult to fully digest on the first pass. So unless you’re into coprophagia, you’ll cook your oats prior to eating. Being ground to a powder, I assume a greater % of the fiber can be utilized by your intestinal tract…so I assume.

Fructooligosaccharide - Hm, well based on language stuff, I can break it down to Fructo Oligo and Saccharide

Fructo, as in high fructose corn syrup….it’s sugar. So is glucose, but so is fructose. There’s a bunch of different types of sugars, just like salts. (Did you know that MSG is not only natural, but essential? Your body is making it as we speak!) In any case we can conclude that Fructose refers to sugar.

Saccharide, I’ve seen this before, I am sure of it. I believe saccharin is an artificial sweetner.

Oligo, I’m not sure. Hm, glucose, fructose, sucrose….. Maybe Fructo is actually Fruct…and Oligo is Ooligosaccharide… I feel like that’s kind of unlikely, but I honestly don’t have the knowledge to make an informed judgement.

Oh wait, check it, Xylooligosaccharide. I’m going out on a limb here and going to guess that these artificial sweeteners or maybe sugars that lack sweetness? In a moment we’ll check the internet on this.

Inulin is….related to insulin? No, that’s too easy, it can’t. Not directly. You’d hear about it in diabetes commercials….probably. I have definitely come across this ingredient before, probably in MetRX bars or something. That must be it…Clif bars have the oats, MetRX has saccharin and inulin.

Magnesium, well shit, that’s in everything in some amount for the most part. Except no in citrate form. Hmmm….it’s possible I have foods with magnesium citrate, it’s unlikely I would retain that it’s a thing. What the hell even is citrate? Citrus? Are we in for a goddamn chemistry lesson here?

1. Fructooligosaccharide

   1. What Peak Bio Boost says -Fructooligosaccharides (FOS)

      Which has been shown to help speed your intestines, fully empty your bowels, protect your gut from “bad” bacteria, and even promote healthy cholesterol levels...48

   2. What the internet says - The first result on Yahoo! is entitled “Benefits and Risks”. Great.
      
      Fructooligosaccharides (FOS) are composed of short fructose chains. They are a type of carbohydrate called oligosaccharides. FOS occur naturally in many plants, which include:

      • blue agave

      • yacon root

      • garlic

      • onion

      • leeks

      • chicory root

      • Jerusalem artichokes

      • asparagus

      • bananas

      Fructooligosaccharides are subtly sweet and low-calorie. They are nondigestible, so they don’t have an effect on blood sugar levels. FOS may also have multiple health benefits.
      
      Okay so they’re sweet fiber. Old person sweet, not actually sweet. Fair enough.
      
      FOS are used primarily as a low-calorie, alternative sweetener.

      Sounds ideal for older people, tbh.

      Side effects and risks

      Use, or overuse, of FOS may result in abdominal distress for some people. Potential side effects may include:

      • diarrhea

      • gas

      • bloating

      • stomach cramps

      • Have been shown in some scientific studies to increase the growth of "bad" bacteria such as Klebsiella Pneumonia and other less-friendly organisms such as E. Coli and many Clostridium species. Klebsiella Pneumonia is associated with the auto-immune disease Ankylosing Spondylitis (AS) and also worryingly is becoming increasingly resistant to antibiotics both in the US and elsewhere.

      So probably don’t reach for FOS when you’re eating your feelings. For the benefits part, I’m just gonna grab the tag lines. I feel like they’re mostly obvious/self-explanatory.
      
      May protect against unhealthy bacteria

      As reported in Digestive and Liver Disease, FOS helps suppress Clostridium perfringens, a toxic bacteria associated with food poisoning. One animal study reported in The Journal of Nutrition indicated that FOS may also provide some protection against salmonella, another food-borne illness.
      
      ….Wait, what? Great, we have two contradicting sources. I think we can conclude that there’s no obvious link between sweet fiber and the E. Coli you probably got from eating rare cheeseburgers.

      “May decrease cholesterol”, “Non-carcinogenic”
      Okay, Enough copy paste from that site. Anything “may” decrease cholesterol. And non-carcinogenic….I was unaware that you were able to sell food products that cause cancer.

   Additionally FOS has been shown to:

   • Enhance magnesium absorption.

   • Promote calcium absorption.

     Well that’s good news if it applies to magnesium citrate.

   Like inulin fiber, FOS appears to be a good thing. Before you decide to try it though, you should be aware of its side-effects.

   Wait…so inulin does not appear to be a good thing? Good God.

2. Oat Fiber

   1. What Peak Bio Boost says - To reinvigorate gut-friendly bacteria, help you poop more often by bulking up your stool, and reduce the need for laxatives by up to 59%. And since it has almost zero carbs, it’s even been shown to help maintain whole-body insulin sensitivity which makes it a great option for the keto diet.

   2. What the Internet says - Oat fiber is neither the same as oatmeal nor is it the same as rolled or instant oats, oat bran, oat flour or oat groats. It is a separate product.
      
      Well F me.

      When making oat fiber, manufacturers grind the non-digestible oat hull to create a low-carb substitute for flour in baked goods and other recipes. Oat fiber can absorb up to seven times its weight in water, helping to bulk up different recipes, including baked goods and meat-based dishes.

      You may wonder how oat fiber differs from oat bran, another source of fiber.

      Not really.

      Oat bran has more carbohydrate than oat fiber, so it shouldn't be considered a substitute. The two products are made differently, have very different textures and provide their own unique benefits.
      
      So back to oat fiber…
      FUNCTIONAL PROPERTIES

      The oat hull exhibits a higher TDF content (primarily insoluble fiber), arguably becoming the preferred raw material source for oat fiber manufacturing and ingredient development. Oat-hull fiber is used for dietary-fiber enrichment and as a multi-functional food ingredient. It acts as a water-activity modulator, bread-crumb humectant, texturizer, friability reducer in low-moisture baked goods, calorie controller, and more. From a physiological aspect, oat-hull fiber is recognized as an excellent participant in promoting gastrointestinal wellness, bulking in particular.
      

      Alright so it’s pretty much what I thought it was.

3. Inulin

   1. What Peak Bio Boost says - Which helps bulk up your stool and lubricate your digestive system so poop glides through your intestines like water in a clean pipe…

   2. What the Internet says - Straight from the NIH …. Inulin is a water soluble storage polysaccharide and belongs to a group of non-digestible carbohydrates called fructans. Inulin has attained the GRAS status in USA and is extensively available in about 36,000 species of plants, amongst, chicory roots are considered as the richest source of inulin. Commonly, inulin is used as a prebiotic, fat replacer, sugar replacer, texture modifier and

      Okay that’s enough of the NIH.

      Inulin may:

      Decrease constipation. In one study, older people with constipation who took 20 to 40 grams of inulin daily for a month had less trouble with constipation.

      Increase helpful bacteria in the colon. Because it has this effect, inulin is called a prebiotic.
      
      Alright so again it makes you poop, can be found in various fruits and vegetables, and apparently it most definitely promotes helpful resident bacterial growth. What are the risks, WebMD? Gonna fact-check you, it’s your time to shine….

      WebMD says, Inulin may also cause:

      • Bloating

      • Abdominal cramping

      • Loose stools

      • Gas

      • More frequent bowel movements

      Risks. Inulin-type prebiotics are generally recognized as safe. Check with your doctor about taking supplements if you are pregnant or breastfeeding. 
      
      Additionally, if for some reason you eat a lot of chicory, it is believed to inhibit the effectiveness of inulin supplements. There’s other stuff about chicory, too, but we’re skipping that. We have to copy/paste more Peak Bio Boost stuff.
      

4. Xylooligosaccharide - Typed it without looking. Just saying.

   What Peak Bio Boost says -

   1. Helps you poop more regularly by speeding up your intestines...38

   2. Softens hard stool so your poops come out quickly and easily with no straining...39

   3. Helps fully empty your bowels so your stomach feels lighter and more empty…40

   4. Makes wiping faster with less chafing because your poop isn’t sticking anymore...

   5. Reduces stomach pain, nausea and discomfort from constipation because you’re pooping more frequently...

   In short, XOS ALONE helps you enjoy the ‘perfect poop’ so you smoothly empty your bowels without pushing, straining, or grunting in 2 minutes or less.
   
   It goes on a bit more like this.

   
   What the Internet says - Xylooligosaccharides and their chemical stability under high-pressure processing combined with heat treatment

   
   Uh…that’s pretty neat, actually. There’s industrial uses for this stuff. But we want to eat it, so…
   
   addition, they are moderately sweet, and stable over a wide range of pH and temperatures and have

   Uh huh
   ommercial importance of these non-digestible oligosaccharides is based on their beneficial properties such as prebioti
   Yep
   However, the effects of XOS on colon cancer are still not well understood.
   
   The take-away here is that Xylo ‘rides are legit and actually work. It probably won’t prevent cancer, but it’ll help prevent constipation and diarrhea. Most of the information though, is about its industrial uses. Both for foodservice purposes as well as for biomass purposes. There may be others. High heat and pressure tolerance probably gets Xylooligiosaccharide into all sorts of places other saccharides can’t go.
   

5. Magnesium Citrate

   1. What Peak Bio Boost says - It’s called Magnesium Citrate and it works WONDERS to help release stubborn poop.

      Magnesium Citrate

      Magnesium is a nutrient that the body needs to stay healthy. Magnesium is important for many processes in the body, including regulating muscle and nerve function, blood sugar levels, and blood pressure.49
      

   2. What the Internet says - What is magnesium citrate?

      Magnesium is a naturally occurring mineral that is important for many systems in the body, especially the muscles and nerves. Magnesium citrate also increases water in the intestines.

      Magnesium citrate is used as a laxative to treat occasional constipation.

      Magnesium citrate may also be used for purposes not listed in this medication guide.

      Magnesium citrate side effects

      Get emergency medical help if you have signs of an allergic reaction: hives; difficult breathing; swelling of your face, lips, tongue, or throat.

      Stop using magnesium citrate and call your doctor at once if you have:

      • no bowel movement within 6 hours after taking the medicine;

      • pain with bowel movements, rectal bleeding;

      • watery diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, severe stomach pain;

      • painful or difficult urination;

      • flushing (warmth, redness, or tingly feeling);

      • a light-headed feeling, like you might pass out;

      • weak or shallow breathing, slow heartbeats; or

      • muscle weakness, increased thirst.

      Common side effects may include:

      • loose stools, diarrhea, stomach cramps;

      • upset stomach;

      • dizziness; or

      • increased sweating.

      This is not a complete list of side effects and others may occur. Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.
      
      This product is used to clean stool from the intestines before surgery or certain bowel procedures (e.g., colonoscopy, radiography), usually with other products. It may also be used for relief of constipation. However, milder products (e.g., stool softeners, bulk-forming laxatives) should be used whenever possible for constipation.Magnesium citrate is a saline laxative that is thought to work by increasing fluid in the small intestine. It usually results in a bowel movement within 30 minutes to 3 hours.
      
      Avoid taking tetracycline/quinolone antibiotics (e.g., doxycycline, tetracycline, ciprofloxacin) within 2 hours before or after this product. Doing so may decrease the effect of the antibiotic.
      
      So magnesium citrate is totally fine, just don’t take more than the recommended dose. I’m not sure why you’d want to double or triple dip on your Peak BIo Boost, but don’t.

This is too goddamn much magnesium citrate.

“But Rocky!”, you say in a larger font size, “What about the economic impact?!”

Well, besides the obvious caveat that everyone’s spending habits will vary, and you may not have quantified the amount of extra money you have spent specifically to alter your poops…heck, you may never have spent money in that way. I’ll spare you my process, as it doesn’t change the outcome of Peak Bio Boost being significantly cheaper.

What If I Could Guarantee That You Enjoy Perfect Poops For The Next 6 Months...
For Just 80 Cents?

I feel like it’s 80 cents per bowel movement. That has to be it.

1-Year 100% Money-Back Guarantee!

Yeah, I’ll spare you all of the sales stuff. The nice thing about this company is that they have no shame in their game. They use the cookie cutter, gimmicky, Billy Mays-approved sales fluff and own it. They also don’t deal with complaints, they just refund your money. You could probably get the same refund multiple times just by calling different times, talking to different associates, and being like “Yeah my bank told me to call the credit card company that told me to talk to you guys” and just go around in the confusion circle until the customer service rep stops caring and just refunds your $15.

But we’re not assholes. We just want to cheat our way to better poops with Peak Bio Boost.